feed your body. feed your brain. feed your soul. feed your life.

im going to be honest. i've slightly stopped caring about the blog updates. GASP.

i mean - i have moments where i tell myself "share this" or "post this"  after a class or lecture. but then the free time comes around and i use it up so quickly and much more productively than lying here writing about it. it's all in my head and at the end of the days i believe that's enough. but now its sunday and i've already forgotten certain moments and how they made me feel! and since we are almost through dialogue and done with anatomy - i have the chance to have a normal - lazy - unproductive sunday night. what will that involve? television - pizza - laundry - and blogging :)

another week come and gone too quick. this is all coming to an end much too quickly. i miss parts of my life back in the "real world" but i'm loving life in the bubble. the friends i've made and the teachers i've learned from. the moments we've shared and the places we've seen. the sunshine and the cold nights. the shopping and the beaches. even the bollywood movies and bikram stories. and can't forget the torture chamber and the posture clinics. every. little. thing. i'll never have all this back again. so please slow it all downnnnnnn. (but hurry up so i can return home to loved ones)

things i've started missing this week (in no particular order)

champagne

montreal bagels and cream cheese

my apartment

what did i learn about in week 6? FASCIA baby - FASCIA. everything revolves around the FASCIA. haha. this will only be funny to people here in the bubble. but jon burras (yoga therapist) talked the FASCIA to death during his two day lecture with us. however - he opened our eyes to so much truth. i finally learned (in depth) about the seven chakras and the three columns of energy rotation and running through our bodies. i loved that part of his talk. i took so many random notes and scribbles - too many to share. actually never mind - looking over them - there's a few i feel the need to post.

belief challenges

how you see the world in your window of perception is how you create your world. 

science is only one window of perception.

the chakras are not physical but they affect the physical. sacred centers of consciousness.

 the language of sport has become the language of war.

emotion is energy in motion.

emotional release vs emotional indulgence. dump your buckets daily.

you don't have to let it out to the world to get it out.

live a life where relaxation is NORMAL. 

if you continue to follow the same model. you will get the same results. CHANGE YOUR MODEL.

 when you stop wanting - you start dying.

there are classes you take you wish would never end. friday night was just that. we were taught by our favorite staff member - balwan. the most lovable and kind person you will ever meet. you should have heart the cheering and clapping for him when heading towards the podium. i grabbed my mat and ran down my line to get closer to him. i wanted to feel his smile for the next 90 minutes. god he was amazing. such a genuine class - this was camel pose "look up and back at the stars. this is what it feels like to fall in love. you are falling in love with yourself."

some posture changes (that i have forgotten to write about)

week three i touched my fingers to my toes in triangle pose for the first time. this was during emmy's triangle pose clinic. i now fall out of triangle every time (thanx emmy). but i get back in and touch the toes again and again. i now touch my forehead to a locked knee in standing separate leg head to knee pose (but this never happens in the morning classes). in standing bow i can almost see my shoulder coming over the top of my head in the mirror - leg is still not anywhere near straight though? this posture is my nemesis. i'm jumpin into a headstand after every class - months ago my friend wes had to help me up and hold me there - now my legs lift up easy and stay still forever. splits are getting better and better - my goal? get the crotch to the floor.

this yoga bubble is my sacred place. my mat is my sanctuary. this journey of exploration and transformation is expanding my mind and opening my heart. 

hmm think im back to loving the blog again....

-xx-

60 > 40

over a month away from home. 60 classes done. sushi celebration last night with my girl erin from san fran :)

i never promised you a rose garden

back from get wet 62 in bikrams torture chamber. 

another two hour class with the boss. i think it was almost as hard as last fridays class. i never got around to posting about that one because he literally dragged us through hell and back and we were left with hardly any time before our posture clinic that night (the one i cried about). but in any case - this was class 10 of week 5 = > 

130ºF. 

45% humidity. 

600+ bodies. 

  1 room. 

2.5 hours. 

26 postures. 

countless stories.

and

bikram choudhury. 

-who else gets this experience?-

this past monday i complained because i started the week off cold and dry in my morning class. i had wanted to kick start week 6 the way we ended week 5. i wanted to SWEAT. and feel like i was dying. this is bikram hot yoga. we come to kill ourselves for 90 minutes - and experience the beautiful rose garden at the end of it all. i swear - i think bikram yogis are masochists deep down. well - be careful what you wish for because i got exactly what i wanted and more. tons and tons of sweat. and no water. there seems to be trend that when the boss keeps us in class for longer than necessary -water and ice run out that much faster. 

tonight chuck and i decided to switch things up and plant ourselves directly in front of the boss. front and center. actually - chuck went first - and i was feeling really low before class wanting to be lazy and coast through - and in one moment i grabbed my mat and followed him. i decided to put myself in the danger zone because i would have no choice but to rock this class. no excuses. and it worked. i stretched and kicked myself to the point where i thought i might pass out. it felt so good. there was definitely more heat pumping into the center of his torture chamber than anywhere else i've been before. i loved it and hated it at the same time. bikram is all love and hate for me. but the love outweighs the hate every time. i survived class tonight with the help of my friends - ada john and chuck - thank you lovely yogis for holding my hand - giving me encouraging words - and sharing your holy water with me :)

now im off to nap because the boss is back and i know i wont see sleep till late hours tonight.... xo

 

 

we are all dreamers

once in awhile you get a teacher that reminds you to DREAM. and dream BIG.

this morning that teacher was tricia donegan from the lower east side studio in new york city. good things come in small packages but fabulous things come from tiny yoga bodies. miss donegan was a little firecracker lighting us up one by one. did i mention she teachers lady gaga? how cool is that.

"have a dream bigger than yourself. we will help you get it"

"if you have a dream. kick up. if you have a dream. stretch forward. if you have a dream. reach for it" 

"you can do it. you ARE doing it"

if ever you're in the area - i urge you to spend 90 minutes of your life at LES

http://www.bikramyogales.com/staff/yoga-teacher-tricia-donegan/

the pressure cooker surprise

POSTURE CLINIC OVERLOAD
in a normal week we have posture clinics in the afternoon followed by lectures/movies in the evening. last week (being week 5 - yes im behind on my posts...) we had TEN posture clinics. and we went through SEVEN postures. SEVEN. a few of us were delivering 2-3 postures a day. (i know i did - it was exhausting - and my third was in front of claire to top it off!). to give you an idea of how over these clinics i was - here's what happened friday night after class. (mind you the class was 2.5 hours and the sweatiest one of life so my reaction wasn't so drastic)

normal post class microphone action - a staff member announces either posture clinic or lecture and the sign in times for each after our break. this particular friday night the majority of us had expected to get the night off. don't ask me why - but we had the idea built up and solid in our minds. (i had already made plans to get the heck out of the hotel and do some night shopping). i mean - with all the visiting teachers in for the weekend we thought maybe they would allow us to spend time with our studio owners etc. OR that they would keep the visiting teachers up all night and give us a rest! well - let me tell you - when they say no expectations - they mean - NO EXPECTATIONS.

i was sitting in the hot room - the lights off - with claire and lea. kat got on the mic and all i remember hearing was "trainees" and "clinic". my mind took a few seconds to register those two words together to realize that my night shopping was NOT happening. within seconds - i was crying. hahaha. really. like a little kid having a fit. my head fell in between my knees and i whined like a baby "i dont want to do it - i dont feel for it" i said to lea in french. her and claire just sat there rubbing my back as i let my frustration out. a few minutes later - we all had a good laugh about it and then i found myself submerged in the hotel pool. (not trying to drown myself hahaha - but letting the moment of frustration float away)

so - the pressure cooker. well - all i have to say is i never imagined it was possible for me to teach a class for 90 minutes. and now - 3 weeks into posture clinics - i see the light. i have already delivered 21 of the 26 postures! and without bragging or sounding full of myself - i have really and truly rocked every single one. i mean of course i have received feedback and have things to work on - i am in no way perfect - but i am very precise in my dialogue and confident in my deliveries. each time i am amazed with myself. i really am better than i think i am. each time i get butterflies and think i might miss a line or two - but i never do (i think once it happened). when im up there - the words just flow out of my mouth. it really blows me away i don't know where it comes from. but im not going to try and understand it - im just thankful that thus far it has come so easily to me. because it is not the case for others. however - for these people - the process is that much more beautiful. watching them grow into themselves and into stronger and more confident yogis is my favorite thing about posture clinics. everyone will be a successful teacher. we are all just going to get there in our own way and at our own time. like a flower petal blooming :)

i will never forget these moments. thank you group 17 :)

and thank you to all the PC teachers for coming back and learning alongside with us all over again :)

some PC scribbles

"it's ok to be outside your comfort zone. go there. be willing to make mistakes"

"there is beauty in the stuggle"

"you can either be perfect - or you can be great"

"channel your nervous energy into effective energy"

"practice acceptance. practice empathy"

"you are almost beyond the point of rebuilding yourselves - this is a beautiful thing"

"the experience will take care of itself"

"be the teacher you want to be - play with it - explore yourselves"

fun facts from the bubble

• i started my day with claire giving me such lovely gifts & cards from friends at BYO :)
• one of those gifts was a homemade chocolate chip banana bread loaf 
• posture clinics today made us all laugh. cry. and breathe. this is a beautiful thing.
•  i let myself be lazy in class tonight. (i prefer to say i took it...easy)
• i managed to get through week 5 without getting team saturday (yay me)
• there are currently 126 teachers (& counting) here for the re-certification starting tomorrow
• over 600 people will be sweating together in one hot room for the next 3 classes
• AND - in exactly one month i will be graduating from the bikram yoga college of india :)

in this moment i am....happy. 

less is more

today...

i delivered three postures - standing separate leg head to knee, tree pose, and toe stand :) 

my studio owner, claire cameron, and student from BYO, pierre beaulieu arrived at TT :)

the boss killed us for two hours in the hot room - and i loved every sweaty second :)

i heard my boyfriends voice for the first time in what seems like forever :)

i ate a whole bag of goldfish crackers :)

and i decided to make this post the shortest one possible :)

goodnight :) 

---------------------------------------------------

oh - here's a little bedtime reading before i go (shared during rajashree's class this morning)

Our Greatest Fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously
give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others.

namaste xx

a day in the life of...

halfway to bulletproof
let me tell you about my day today. i took my 50th class this morning here at teacher training. and guess who killed me softly through the entire 90 minute class? the beautiful rajashree choudhury. (bikrams wife for all you non bikramers still reading my blog). at first i didn't recognize her - up on the podium - so far from me. i looked around at all the students whispering "is that her? no she looks too young...yes it's her!" i just remember thinking - this is my 50th class! and i get raj to teach me. how lucky i am. (oh god im talking bikramish...). but really, what a great way to push me through into the second half. i loved her. you would never in a million years think she was married to bikram. COMPLETE OPPOSITES. but i can see how they balance each other out perfectly. at the end of class she took the time to sit and read to us. her voice was so soothing i fell into such a deep savasana. normally - i admit - i do tend to wiggle wiggle and twisssst around on my mat after class all anxious like, but not today. she had me practicing stillness and patience. thank you raj :)

and that stillness carried on through with me for most of the day. after my shower and daily bowl of oatmeal (exciting stuff here at TT) i made my way down to the pool for some dialogue studying. normally - i flock to the crowd and chit chat my way around the different groups of students. but today i went straight to the only long chair available over in the corner behind two palm trees. i kept to myself for the entire hour - rehearsing dialogue over and over in my head. triangle pose was my bitch. my mind was calm and ready for posture clinic....

(i was also in a zombie like state at that point i was so relaxed)

pressure cooker
i know i haven't written about posture clinics yet and how they work or my feedback but i have been saving all that juicy info for a post of it's own. in a nutshell - we are reciting one to two postures a day (holy fast) in cabanas by the pool with two groups in each cabana. i belong to group 17. we rotate with different groups daily but always travel with our core group :) visiting teachers provide us with feedback to our deliveries and offer us tools to add to our toolbox when we leave TT and start teaching back at our home studios.

today i delivered triangle. and i rocked it :) i have been giving very strong deliveries since the beginning and each time i'm more impressed with myself than the last. but - im humble - because i know that i'm bound to slip up at some point. and im willing to go there - to make a mistake. see what it's like to stumble. and find my way out. push through. and finish the posture. one of the teachers told us "there is beauty in the struggle" and that stuck with me. (ill explain why in my post about the pressure cooker). im going off on a tangent now - soon ill be telling stories like bikram!

ok back to triangle - i had been asked to deliver the set up part "babyish" and then to anialate (spelling?) them in the action part of the posture. i cant explain to you what its like to hear yourself talking and saying all the right words - with all the right inflections - gestures - pauses. its really an out of body experience. and sometimes i wonder if this will be the way each time i teach - for 90 minutes every class? that seems like an awful lot of out of body time - no?

anyways - there i went off talking again. TRIANGLE! i delivered it in front of 4 visiting teachers (from san antonio, new zealand, and los angeles) and jake (from staff - whom i have a crush on - no worries mike - this man is over 60 years old im sure). jake walked into the room and right then and there i decided i was going next haha. i wanted to impress him. and i did. after i finished the posture and turned to the "judges" all i saw was smiles. mark from san antonio looked at me with the BIGGEST smile and just said "WOW". my zombie state of mind was long gone. i was on cloud nine. giddy like a school girl. really - i felt so high on life. imagine this feeling after 90 minutes in front of my friends and familiar faces at BYO? goosebumps all over and butterflies in my belly.


chuck
this day was only getting better. walking into the hot room for our evening class i saw there were more visiting teachers than normal. i thought to myself - i can't wait for claire to be here tomorrow - it will be so nice to have a piece of home here by my side. and just as i was finishing that thought - i looked up - and up a little bit more - to find a familiar face. chuck woodward :) he had taught at BYO for a couple months when the studio first opened last year. he is now back in kelowna - but it felt good to see him nonetheless. and tomorrow we will be the three musketeers! our evening class was taught by bikrams niece - pubali - who owns her own studio in manchester, new hampshire. she did not introduce herself as having any relation to bikram. it was only later on this evening that we found out - and i respected her even more for not coming up on the podium and stating right away her connection to the boss. but even without knowing her background - i could feel her closeness to his teachings. isnt that weird? she talked about him differently. i was so full of energy from my feedback that afternoon so i was floating. my body was light and i flew through the whole class. have i mentioned the line system? if not - it doesn't matter. but im on line one today and tomorrow. uh huh- thats right in front of the mirrow. in front of the podium. and in front of 10 lines filled with over 40 yogis on each one. that's a ton of yoga going on in one room. one day i hope to be up on that podium witnessing the view that these teachers get to see.

little sidenote on chuck: when i first starting practicing back at BYO last year - i was always in the back row. self conscious of having people behind me. chuck continuously pushed me to practice in the front row - as a workshare girl - i was to set an example. he kept saying "your practice is great - dont hide - get out there". litte did he know it had nothing to do with a lack of confidence in my practice but everything to do with the scar on my back. eventually - i was convinced. no one CARED about my scar. so i got up there - front of the class. and did my thing. soon - i had shifted from full tank tops to sports bras. and now - here i am today - in front of all these yogis. and there is no judgment. i still have moments of insecurity - but that is a work in progress. at least i know i'm willing to go out of my comfort zone.

- so thank you to chuck who pushed me to the front -

the choudhury trifecta
choudhury blood in the morning. choudhury blood in the evening. what would follow as a late night snack? more choudhury blood :) yup - my guru is back. he had been gone for too long. two weeks. traveling around spreading the power of his yoga. we had missed him terribly. the building felt different with his absence. really. i know it sounds crazy but it's true. this evening i could feel him coming down the stairs and approaching the lecture room to start his stories - we all waited for his famous entry...

"check check. 1 2 3 4. check check. hi guysssss. did you miss me?"

there was definitely more laughs tonight :)

xx

oriah mountain dreamer

THE INVITATION

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living
I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing

It doesn’t interest me how old you are
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love
for your dreams, for the adventure of being alive

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow,
if you have been opened by life’s betrayals or,
have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own,
if you can dance with wilderness and let the ecstasy fill you
to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be
careful, realistic, or to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you’re telling is true
I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself,
if you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul

I want to know if you can be faithful, and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty
even when it’s not pretty every day,
and if you can source your life from God’s presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine,
and still stand on the edge of a lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon, “yes!”

It doesn’t interest me to know where you live,
or how much money you have.

I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone,
and do what needs to be done for the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you are, how you came to be here,
I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have
studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself,
and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

namaste xx

Captured: WEEK FOUR

WEEK FOUR - DAY FOUR

i had started writing this post yesterday (thursday) which was day FOUR of week FOUR. yup. i'm still here :) and now another day has come and gone - i can hardly keep track. anyways - i got side tracked (normal to happen in this bikram bubble) and then the post was left with the dot dot dot. 

bottom of the barrel
today (thursday) we were blessed to be taught in the morning by emmy and in the evening by jim. in between we had lisa from las vegas give us an inspirational lecture and offer a deeper insight into the yoga philosophy. after lisa we fit in a posture clinic before the 5pm class. afterwards was anatomy. just to give you an idea - this training is NONSTOP. it is all about time management. every break we get we must decide: eat - sleep - study - or diconnect? if you're lucky - you get all 4. otherwise - pick your priority. in our evening class jim told us we were at the bottom of the barrel. the grit of the grit. we were at the bottom of the wave looking up at the light - and it could only get bigger, brighter and better from here on. here's hoping. as bikram says - the darkest place is under the lamp. we are definitely under the lamp right now. and i can't wait to get out from underneath. i feel strong and happy overall - but to be honest. i feel like bit by bit - my body is breaking down. my mind is giving up. emotions are out of wack. my lower back feels like one big cement brick. my knee is aching. my shoulder feels bruised and disconnected from my body. i'm trying to think positive and say next week i'll be stronger but it's hard to see the light. one posture at a time, one class at a time, one day at a time...

some LOVELINESS shared by LISA from LAS VEGAS

the eight limbs of yoga

1- yama (the donts): practice non-violence, non-lying, non-stealing, non-sensuality, non-attachment

2- niyama (the dos): cleanliness & purity, contentment, austerity & endurance, self study & introspection, dedication

3- asana: actual physical postures, designed to open our mind & give us strength, flexibility,  and energy. "posture holding still. breathing always normal"

4- pranayama: our breath & life force. helps us manage overwhelming emotions and feelings of anxiety. until one is aware of their breath the effects of the posture are not there.

5- pratyahara: non attachment & withdrawal from the senses. can transcend all agitation and suffering.

6- dharana: the practice of focused and powerful concentration. calms inner awareness and increases the value of our postures

7- dhyana: devotional meditation. stills agitations of our minds and opens our hearts. linked with the law of attraction (i now have this by this...). be clear with the universe. quiet your mind. 

8- samadhi: truly comes when we dissolve the ego consciousness of "i i i". signifies a state where everything is yoga. everything is bliss. we can achieve this NOW.

"you create your reality with your thoughts"

"yoga is the process of a spiritual unfolding"

"peace comes from within"

"the truth is all there is"

"every moment is an opportunity for love and transformation" 

 

halfway to bulletproof

after tomorrow mornings class - it will officially be the end of my first month here. almost halfway :) sometimes i feel like this process is in full speed flying by and other times its slowwwwww as molasses. i'm stuck in a time warp and can't get out. i'm excited for next week because a little piece of home will be here with me - my studio director claire is visiting :) for now - im contenting myself with the fact that tomorrow is saturday - i'm getting a mani/pedi and new yoga wear :) i think i deserve it...

goodnight xx

still not over you....

anatomy lectures. so far so good. until tonight.

CANCER....

that word still knocks the wind out of me. i sat there wondering how many others around me had been or are currently affected by this terrible monster of a disease. and if that word hits them like a brick wall every time as it does to me? i hate that word. i hate what it did to my mom. my family. my life. to me...i hate that i just had to sit there tonight hearing all about it. when i never want to talk about it. ever.

dr p. mentioned how if someone who had cancer would put their cancerous cells into another person's body - that person's system would be able to fight those cancer cells off (i think that's how he said it...) and all i thought of was the lyric from nirvana's heart shaped box song "i wish i could eat your cancer when you turn black". i wish it would be that easy. i wish i could have taken it from her. fought it. and beat it for her. i wish she was still here..

at the very end of his lecture - dr p stated how colon cancer is the most preventable cancer in men and explained why. i sat there thinking please don't say it - please don't say it. and then he did. "and cervical cancer is the most preventable among women. that's why they get their pap smear tests every year." of course that did it for me - and i started crying (again). if only my mom had gotten her tests. i had stopped thinking that way awhile ago because there was no point - it was too late. but tonight it was thrown in my face - she could have prevented it and she would still be here. im trying not to be angry right now. angry because i've started thinking about the bad memories of what the cancer did to her as opposed to the happy memories before it took over her body, mind, and her life. which is the only way i have learned to deal with it - blocking out the bad - taking in the good.

and now i just want to call my dad. but its almost four in the morning in montreal.....

i realize this post is quite personal - but it's part of my journey and i want to document it...

goodnight.

Captured: WEEK THREE

first posture clinic - erin - lauren - bianca - amelie

in and out burger (overrated)

viv and her animal sauce fries

late night lectures are fun with these ladies :)

CLUB SATURDAY

pool sessions

sexy san fran lady

santa monica pier

super moon & eagle pose

amour.

yogis & rollercoasters

pacific park

yogolicous - end to a great night :)

WEEK THREE: emotional rollercoaster

LA weekends
the day was not starting off well. i woke up with a sinking feeling in my stomach knowing i had not only one class to get through but TWO. two classes on a saturday morning. normally friday evening i console myself with the fact there is only one more. one more. then my body would be free to rest. but this saturday was different. i had a make-up class to do. my freedom seemed so far away with two classes ahead of me.

the first class was HELL. im not kidding. if ever someone was to wonder what hell is like, any teacher trainee from spring 2012 would have the answer. i don't know what happened. maybe we had gotten used to the heat and they decided to "up the ante" on us? maybe we expected an easy breezy class for a saturday morning? either way - it knocked us all down to perma dead body pose state. at one point i remember thinking "im not even free after this...i still have another class...i just want out..." and broke down right then and there during rabbit pose.

long story short - i managed to survive both classes that morning. with angela banach by my side during the second one. she chose to do the make up class with me VOLUNTARY - we had both arrived to a posture clinic at the same time and for some reason i got a makeup class and she didn't. she said "no, we do it together. if you're late. i am late also". i was so thankful to have her there next to me - rocking and smiling the whole way through. at the end she said "yes girl - no one will steal our peace. we are better. it's done. we are better"....she was right. i was the winner for not letting the unfairness of my makeup class situation get the better of me. and you know what? we complete 98 classes here at teacher training. my total would be 99 now. so i decided why not make it 100? looks like i'll be doing a voluntary makeup class of my own one saturday morning :)

funny how quick our body and mind can forget the pain we just endured. soon after my torturous morning i was poolside with my fruit smoothie enjoying the california sun with my yogi friends - later that afternoon i took a well deserved nap and spent the early evening in bed with norah jones soothing my soul. and if that couldn't get any better - a group of us went over to santa monica pier to see the super moon and discover a little piece of this large city called LA.

what a fun night. a parisien. two canadian girls. two san fran ladies. and a swedish boy. on a rollercoaster ride over the ocean under the super moon california sky. eating frozen yogurt and laughing all the way home in a beast of a truck.

pleasure really does taste that much sweeter when there is pain...

"when you have gone so far that you can't manage one more step, then you've just gone half the distance that you're capable of." (thank you heather macdonald for sending me this xo)

im tired and this post could go on forever - really so much more to say but sometimes less is more. today i bought a candle. a massive tea mug. and a "little pink book" to keep my thoughts. all three are on my night table along with gifts from home and pictures of loved ones. my hotel room feels a little bit more like home tonight...xx